This Jewish participant on the list wishes to give his Christian brethren
a Christmas present. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everyone ~!!!
Harold and Linda Snider
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Fri, 20 Dec 1996 16:56:29 -0500 (EST)
From: John Rae <raej@gov.on.ca>
To: hsnider@clark.net
Subject: [Fwd: FW: Actual Church Announcments (fwd)] (fwd)
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Fri, 20 Dec 1996 01:57:11 -0500 (EST)
From: Vicki Martel <martel@ican.net>
To: blau@nps.navy.mil
Cc: benninge@golden.net, mmgram@hometown.on.ca, fourwinds@halhinet.on.ca,
hay@mail.flarc.edu.on.ca, bunny@sos.on.ca,
Cathy_Lee@takujaksat.learnnet.nt.ca, ciwied@dogwood.tyler.wm.edu,
efd@idirect.com, soule@rain.org, harryr@cam.org, martelj@cancom.net,
jkost@nexxcorp.com, raej@gov.on.ca, penguins@idirect.com,
ksutton@headwaters.com, ac354@freenet.durham.org, lmartel@otag.com,
lmartel@bconnex.net, ac353@freenet.durham.org, marty@cancom.net,
ab745@freenet.durham.org, ac355@freenet.durham.org,
michael_misetich@msn.com, nlee@netcom.ca, norlites@halhinet.on.ca,
682809@mail.durhamc.ican.net, rmartel@cancom.net, rsilver@uci.edu,
71776.2656@compuserve.com, martels@gort.canisius.edu, teridunn@aol.com,
tonybiro@toronto.ark.com, mushers@halhinet.on.ca,
ab705@freenet.durham.org
Subject: [Fwd: FW: Actual Church Announcments (fwd)]
Hi all. I honestly did NOT write these.
>Return-Path: <berryc@sympatico.ca>
Subject: FW: Actual Church Announcments (fwd)
Something to put a smile on your face :^)
15 Actual Announcements Taken From U.S. Church Bulletins:
1) Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help.
2) Thursday night - potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.
3) Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.
4) For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery
downstairs.
5) The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David
Alan Belzer,
the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.
6) This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of
the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
7) Tuesday at 4pm there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk
will please come early.
8) Wednesday, the Ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will sing
"Put Me In My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor.
9) Thursday at 5pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All
wishing to
become Little Mothers, please see the minister in his private study.
10) This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay
an egg on the altar.
11) The service will close with "Little Drops Of Water". One of the ladies
will start
(quietly) and the rest of the congregation will join in.
12) Next Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of
the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will
come forward
and get a piece of paper.
13) The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they
may be seen in the church basement Friday.
14) A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music
will follow.
15) At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?"
Come early and listen to our choir practice.
And some more:
* Weight Watchers will meet a 7 p.m. at the First Presbyterian Church.
Please use large double door at the side entrance.
* The 1991 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11.
* Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.
* Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several
new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
* Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes.
* The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning
to join the choir.
* Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan in preparing for
the girth of
their first child.
* Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
* The Lutheran men's group will meet at 6 p.m. Steak, mashed potatoes,
green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.
* The associate minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan
last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours."
Vicki and Marc Martel
martel@ican.net
Check out The MultiMedia Gramma at http://www.hometown.on.ca/mmgram/index.html
Check out a co-operative preschool at http://freenet.durham.org/eocp
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